“A man that hath friends must show himself friendly” Proverbs 18:24
A woman desperate and lonely felt totally isolated from the world. She
had no friends where she lived and no one to pour out her heart to. One
day she left her apartment and went door to door asking people if they
would be her friend. Instead of finding a friend she was rejected. She
tried going to the store and asking people to be her friend. What she
received was dismissal by people who thought she was weird.
With extreme anxiety she tried one more time by attending a woman’s
Bible study group she read about in the paper. She was warmly greeted in
the beginning, but as she started sharing her problems with each lady,
others started avoiding her. At the end of the meeting everyone left
quickly so they didn’t have to talk to her. Now she sits in her apartment
even more despondent and lonely.
This story isn’t a work of fiction. It happened in a large city. The story was related by a friend of mine who tries to stay in contact with
her. She is discouraged because the woman refuses any advice or help.
Instead, she wallows in a mire of never-ending self-pity.
A case like this happens all the time. I know because there was a time I
was so shy that I was afraid of my own shadow. I had just moved to
Tucumcari and knew very few people. I wanted friends, but I was afraid to
talk to anyone because I was afraid of rejection. All of this changed when
I finally made the decision to start talking to people. At first I was
scared to death so I started by asking them questions about themselves and
let them do the talking.
My big breakthrough came when I quit trying so hard. I started
associating with people who had like interests. I took college classes,
attended Tupperware parties, went to an exercise class, found a Sunday
School class with women who had many of the same interests, and started
attending a Bible study group. When I quit trying so hard, I found people
I enjoyed being around. As I visited with them I would ask questions
because I wanted to know more about them and their experiences. Everyone
loves to talk about themselves, but I soon found I enjoyed listening to
what they had to say. Everyone wants to have a friend and I learned it
begins by being friendly with others. While everyone wants someone they
can share their troubles with, no one wants to hear about troubles ALL of
Like Ecclesiastes tells us, there is a time for everything. There is a time
to share your troubles and a time to listen to someone else’s troubles.
If you want a friend, be a friend to someone. Reach out to someone today
because everyone needs a friend.